Our mill grinds only what is put into it. Put in good grain and good products come out. Put in rotten grain and you get rotten products.

Good or Bad Thoughts? Good or Bad Words? Good or Bad Deeds? Or nothing—and rattle?

In computer programmer lingo, this is known as “garbage in, garbage out.”

What raw materials do you put into your brain?

So much of what passes for entertainment is uninspiring, negative and just plain nasty. No one’s life is made better by watching “Jersey Shore.” Do the programs you watch make you feel better or worse? If they are focused on showing people at their worst, turn them off. The same thing goes for music, magazines and, yes, even the news. You should be informed, but the latest scare from TV news does not help you to be informed and it will not bring on good thoughts.

Are the people you associate with upbeat and positive, or do they always find the dark lining in every silver cloud? Does every sentence contain at least one profanity? Do they try to pump themselves up by putting others down with gossip?

Always look for opportunities to feed your brain with good stuff. Avoid the negative, the angry, the unhappy. “Our mill grinds only what is put into it.”

1.More often than not when anyone complains about anything there’s an opportunity wrapped up in the complaint.

Many businesses were created in response to complaints. People complained that something they wanted was not available, or it was hard to get, or the quality wasn’t up to their standards, or…whatever the complaint, the response can be the creation of a successful new product or service.

2.Listen when other people complain about situations. Make it standard procedure to turn the coin over—see what opportunity is spelled out on the other side.

Ask yourself, “How could this complaint be addressed?” Think about solutions you could offer.

3.Listen when you yourself kick about little “personal” things that get your goat. When you act to correct these annoyances you not only get rid of the bother, but it can touch off a whole new attitude for the constructive handling of all sorts of things that bother you.

How often do you grouse about not being able to find things, or that you can’t make your computer do what you want it to do. A day spent with an organizer could solve the first problem, and a computer class at your local college could resolve your other complaint. A little time invested now could make you much more productive—and stop your complaints!

4.Remember that when we refuse to do anything but complain about things that bother us we perpetuate an endless cycle of frustration.

Are you going to continue to complain about that $#@%^# computer, or are you going to take action?

5.Get things out of your system by crabbing about things first if you must—but then ask yourself, “How can I capitalize on this?”

OK, sometimes we just want to bitch. So do a little complaining. Set a timer, and let yourself whine and moan for seven minutes. Then stop and come up with a solution. (You might find it hard to keep complaining for a full seven minutes when you realize how silly you sound and that your complaining isn’t getting you anywhere.)

6.When something about your work doesn’t suit you, be sure to turn the coin over. Here’s your chance to go to town in an area that you yourself control.

Don’t like your job? Bored with your business? Find ways to challenge yourself and make things more interesting.

7.Remember, there is not just one opportunity on the other side of the coin—there are often several.

In school, we were taught that there is one correct answer to every question. In life, there can be dozens or even hundreds of workable solutions.

The next time you hear yourself or someone else complain, stop and ask, “So what am I going to do about this? Where is the opportunity for me to do something exciting and wonderful?”

Want to be happy? Act as though you are happy.

Want recharge your marriage? Remember how you felt in the early days of your relationship, and act that way again.

Want to have a job you can love? Act as though you love your current job.

Want to be more confidant? Act as though you are confident.

Acting as if you already have what you want will change your attitude to a more positive one. It will also alter how you behave toward other people and how they react to you. You will create the habits necessary to get—and be—what you want.

Acting as if is not easy. It takes practice and reinforcement. You will need to change the negative thoughts and actions that have become habits over many years. Cut yourself some slack while you are establishing new patterns, but keep acting as if and your new attitude will become a habit.

Try it—and be amazed by the results!

To be more and achieve more, you must start by believing that change is possible. It is. You are not locked in to the life you have today.

Do not become discouraged when the changes you want do not happen overnight, or you find yourself backsliding into old, bad habits. You may take two steps forward and one step back many times, but the idea is to keep up the forward progress.

Here are ten ways in which each of us can change himself for the better.

1. Accept yourself. In a study made of a group of college students, it was found that those who were healthiest mentally nearly always accepted  themselves,  with  all  their faults and virtues, just as naturally as they accepted other phenomena of nature: the brooks, the valleys, the mountains, the trees. Don’t continually tear yourself apart because you don’t think you’re worthy of being loved and accepted by others.
2. Believe in yourself. Everyone has some special talent, or mark of individuality. If you don’t know what yours is, that doesn’t mean you don’t possess one. Keep seeking till you find out what your best talents are.
3. Think of how to make others happy. If you spend too much time wondering whether or not you’re happy, you won’t be.
4. Keep your hands and your mind occupied most of the time. As the old saying goes, “Idle hands are the devil’s playground.”
5. Be good to yourself. Be sure to allow for some recreational activities in your life. Always have an activity that will be fun for you planned for the near future. Always have something you are looking forward to.
6. Try to make others feel comfortable and at ease. When you meet someone for the first time, concentrate on trying to make him feel comfortable. That will keep you from feeling self-conscious. It is almost impossible for two thoughts to occupy the mind at the same time. If you concentrate on thinking about the other person, you will be too busy to worry about yourself, and you won’t give those around you the impression that you’re self-centered.
7. Decide which of your worries can be cured. Then do something about them. If you have some worries you can’t do anything about, learn to accept the situation involved without bitterness.
8. Love yourself, and then learn to love as many persons as you can besides yourself. If there are some you can’t help disliking, try to be fair to them. Look for their good traits. Everyone has them you know.
9. Believe in some Power higher and greater than yourself. If you don’t want to call that power God, then call it by whatever name you choose. Believe, also, in a universe that is working toward some final good purpose. You won’t always know what the final pattern will be, but try to make the stitches you yourself sew as fine and beautiful as possible, so you can be proud and happy about them. We all contribute to the fabric of life.
10. Forget the past. Yesterday was a dream; tomorrow may never come. Today is all we have, so use this fragment of time in the best way you can.

Put some humor in your life. Do you have a favorite comic strip, TV show or web site that makes you laugh?
Take a quick break to enjoy it.
This site always makes me laugh.

Jump. Working out releases endorphins that can make you feel happier and more energetic. I recently bought a mini trampoline, and when I feel down or tired I jump up and down for a few minutes. It instantly picks me up. If you don’t have a trampoline handy, try doing jumping jacks, skipping rope or just taking a brisk walk—anything to get your heart pumping and the endorphins flowing.

Call a friend. Talking with a friend can instantly pick you up, especially if you do not talk as often as you would like. Remember that this is not a gripe session, so call a positive-thinking friend and keep the conversation upbeat.

Finish something. Are there tasks that have been on your to-do list forever? Pick one and do it. Any one, it doesn’t matter how small. Then cross it off your list. If that does not make you smile, nothing will.

Eat chocolate. No, I don’t mean absent-mindedly gobbling that half a Snickers bar you found smashed in the bottom of your purse. I’m talking about enjoying the really good stuff. Keep a square of premium chocolate stashed away for the times when you need a special treat. Eat it slowly and savor it. Not only does chocolate have health benefits (especially dark chocolate), it tastes really good.

Put on happy music. Get out the iPod and cue up your favorite song–you know, the one that makes you tap your feet, or recalls memories of an especially wonderful time. You will be smiling before the end of the first verse.

Make someone else smile. Doing something nice for someone else is the surest way to put a smile on your own face. Whether you perform a random act of kindness for a stranger or do something special for a friend or family member, their happiness will make you feel happy, too.

There are some bad things happening in the financial markets right now. And things may get worse before they get better. Especially if the government gets involved, as they always want to do. But we are not all using our last dime to fuel up our SUVs so we can drive over to the soup kitchen.

In fact, when you look at polls about the economy, lots of people say they are worried. However, when the questions are asked another way, they say they are doing fine—but they are worried about other people. You know, the people with the sad stories they keep seeing on the news.

Think about every story you have read about the economy over the last several years. For example, before every holiday season we get all of the stories about how merchants expect spending this year to be lower than last year. They are going to have to resort to sales (gasp!) to get customers into the stores. As if there were never sales at holiday times in the past.

The best part comes when the season’s spending is tallied up. We get the headlines about how spending was “only” 5% higher than last year, and what a disappointment that is. Huh? After you told us everyone was expecting spending to decline, a 5% increase is a disappointment? I am not a math whiz, but I understand that a 5% increase is better than a decrease.

Almost every story I read has a similar agenda: make people think things are terrible and there is no good news. I had this reinforced this morning when I saw a reporter’s request for people to interview for an upcoming story about whether or not workers will have enough money to retire. They were looking for people in three categories, and not one of them included people who feel comfortable that they do have enough money to retire. Every person they will interview will be someone who makes the reporter’s point about how bad things are.

Are there people who, whether through bad decisions or just plain bad luck, are hurting? Certainly. There always have been, and there always will be. We all feel for the people who fall on hard times and most of us look for ways to help them. But don’t fall for the lie that we are all “just one paycheck away from being homeless.”

There are things you should do to protect yourself. For example, you might want to reconsider having more money in any one bank than the FDIC will insure. Don’t spend money you do not have for things you do not need. Do not borrow to purchase depreciating assets, and that includes almost anything you would buy with a credit card. All of these things are good advice even when the economy is booming.

I am going on strike, starting now: I am not going to read any of the stories about how bad the economy is. ‘Bye, media. You will not be missed. Start the Great Depression without me.

Losing weight is simple: Eat less and exercise more. Simple, right? But not easy, as you can attest if you have ever tried to drop those stubborn pounds. Keeping the commitment to make healthy eating choices and hit the gym regularly is hard.

That is the way it is in much of life, including business. We know what we should do—that’s simple. But doing it, consistently and for the long term, is anything but easy.

How can you stay on the right track, doing the simple things that will make you successful? Here are some tips for doing the right thing, even when it isn’t easy.

Focus on your goal. Instead of fretting about how hard it is to do something, concentrate on how good things will be when you reach your goal. Thinking about what success will be like can make working toward the goal seem easier.

Have a plan. What steps are you going to take to reach that goal? Be specific. In the weight loss example, your plan might include walking a certain number of miles every day or going to aerobics class three times a week, not just “exercise more.” Your plan might be writing a certain number of pages of your novel every day, making ten cold calls, posting to your blog, completing one language lesson, or any specific action that takes you toward your goal. Break your big goal into small steps.

Write it down! Once you have a goal and a plan, write it down. Putting it in writing makes it more likely you will follow through and do it. Post your goal and your plan somewhere where you will see it every day: on your bathroom mirror, over your computer monitor, or next to the telephone.

Share your goal. Tell others what you are doing. Making a commitment outside of yourself helps you to stick to your plan.

Get rid of negativity. If you are surrounded by people who are hopeless and helpless, you will start to be that way, too. Spend your time with people who are upbeat and positive. It will make a huge difference in how you feel and how much you accomplish.

Do something every day. Doing what you need to do can become a habit. Get in the habit by doing what you know you should do every single day. I love this productivity tip from Jerry Seinfeld.

Reward yourself for small successes. Celebrate when you reach a milestone. Or perhaps just for keeping at your plan. Get a massage, go out to lunch with a friend, or buy that small extravagance you have been coveting. Appreciate the progress you have made.

Don’t beat yourself up when you backslide. It happens. You will have a day here and there when you do not move toward your goal. Maybe you even get farther away from it. Do not waste time berating yourself, but pick up where you left off and start moving forward again.

Just do it. Do not wait for inspiration or magic. Just get up every day and do what you know you need to do. It will not always be easy, but the rewards are sweet.

Allowing your mind to dwell on the negative definitely affects how you feel, and may even affect what happens. After all, if you always expect bad things to happen, will you take the actions necessary to make good things happen? Probably not, because you have internalized the idea that good things do not happen to you.

You may believe that how you think can not change, but that is not at all true. You can make a conscious choice to think positive thoughts and change how you feel.

Think positive but realistic thoughts

As part of your philosophy, realize that you can control your thoughts, as long as you are mentally healthy. And you will remain mentally healthy if you practice positive but realistic thinking.

Make constructive suggestions to yourself daily. But don’t make them so all-inclusive that your rational mind will laugh at them. For instance, Coue’s formula, “Every day in every way I am getting better and better,” worked for those who were not analytical. But it couldn’t work for anyone who said to himself, “But that’s ridiculous. The pain in my big toe is not getting any better; I’ve never learned to control my temper, and my headaches are not vanishing.”

Positive affirmations are fine, but they must be keyed to one’s realistic expectations.

“This will pass,” is more realistic than, “Everything is getting more wonderful every minute.” The unconscious mind will accept, “I am going to sleep well, and wake up feeling fine tomorrow morning,” sooner than it will accept, “I am going to sleep well every night of my life.”

Give the unconscious mind positive thoughts to chew on, but don’t give it unrealistic thoughts that the conscious mind refuses to swallow.

You and you alone control your real thoughts. Thieves may break down your doors and enter your house, and steal your possessions. But you are always safe in your innermost thoughts. No matter what life does to you, you can control them.

The man who learned to be happy. Gamaliel Bradford, the famous biographer, once said that he would have spared himself many years of suffering if he had known in his youth the lesson he learned much later: that he could think about anything he wanted to, and dismiss all thoughts that irked him from his mind. You can learn this lesson today, right this instant.

Let us remember what Alfred Loomis said: “I am bigger than anything that can happen to me. All these things—sorrow, misfortune, and suffering—are outside my door. I am in the house, and I have the key.”

Use the key to alter your thinking and change your life in meaningful ways.