Along with the rest of the world, on New Year’s Day I made a lot of new resolutions. I felt good after making them—kind of satisfied with myself. But here it is the last of January and some of these grand resolutions are beginning to crack, and I’m looking for the reason. I think I have found it. You can’t create habits simply by resolving. Only indomitable persistence, trying and failing, and trying again and failing not so soon, will make those resolutions a reality.

Get out your resolutions, your aims, your quota, or whatever has been your goal. Then say, “I’ll make the flame of my resolve just as hot today, and in February, and throughout the year as on January 1st; and, by the Eternal, I’ll do it!”

Resolutions can fail us because, although we start with enthusiasm, that enthusiasm dims with the day-to-day reality of sticking with our resolutions.

One way to rekindle the excitement and commitment you felt when you made your resolutions is to look for ways to experience successes with them. Set intermediate goals that you can celebrate as you reach them. For example, instead of only focusing on your goal of losing 20 pounds, set an intermediate goal of losing five pounds. When you reach that, aim for the next five pounds.

Another is to have a goal partner. Your partner does not have to be working toward the same goals as you. By sharing your goals, holding each other accountable and enjoying your successes together, you will be inspired to continue working toward bigger and better goals.

Nobody loves an adventure any more than I, but you wouldn’t catch me setting sail over an uncharted sea with no maps to guide and a captain who didn’t know the way. Before I get on a ship I want to know what port it makes.

Take some time this week to chart your courses so as to avoid known dangers and difficulties and plan to reach port.

Where do you see yourself at this time next year? Do you want to be exactly where you are today, doing exactly what you are doing now? Or do you want to “explore new ports,” having new adventures along the way?

Perhaps your life and career are on the right path, and your goals and objectives relate to continuing on your present course. Or you may want to make major changes. Either way, knowing where you are headed makes it more likely that you will end up where you want to be.

As we come to the end of another year, this is a good time to take stock of where you are, contemplate where you want to be, and determine how to get from here to there.

Every Monday, Wm. H. Danforth, founder of the Ralston Purina Company, would place a Monday Morning Message on the desks of some of his top employees. These messages were intended to inspire and motivate the employees to be their best, for themselves and for the company.

Many of Mr. Danforth’s messages were compiled in a series of books, now in the public domain. Although these messages were originally written in the 1920s and 1930s, many are still relevant today. I enjoyed reading them, and thought you might, too.

Each Monday morning, I will publish one of Mr. Danforth’s Monday Morning Messages along with my commentary about the message and how you might apply it in your own life.

Here is our first Monday Morning Message.

The Best That Is in You

The world is full of fine people who do their everyday jobs. It is not everyday work that has made the Purina Mills what they are today, and it is not everyday jobs that will lead to your growth, development, and advancement. Put a job in that “For Action” basket that is worth the best that is in you this week.

Do you spend your week feeling busy, but look back and realize you accomplished very little? It is easy to get caught up in the day-to-day and forget about the big picture. Email, phone calls, meetings and the daily routine can keep you busy although you are not moving forward.

Choose one thing that you are going to accomplish this week and commit to doing it. Something that will make a difference. When choosing a task, ask yourself what completing it will do for you. Will it help you get more clients? Create a new income stream? Build your professional reputation? Select a goal that will make a real difference.

You may also choose a project that can not be accomplished in one week, but may be something that you work at for several weeks or months. It might be creating a new product, launching a marketing campaign, becoming a public speaker, writing a book or anything that will make you more profitable. In that case, identify specific steps you will take this week that will lead you closer to reaching your goal.

Set a goal that will make you feel satisfied with your accomplishment when you look back at your week.

Watch for other Monday Morning Messages every week here at CathyStucker.com.

Do you remember those dreams you once had and the goals you set?

This article is for anyone over the age of about 35. But the age group I’m really thinking of is 45 plus.

So here’s the question again, expanded a little…

Back when you were in your twenties, do you remember the career or business dreams you had? Do you recall the goals you set for yourself?

At the time they probably felt achievable. You didn’t think you were being particularly unrealistic or overly optimistic. You had dreams and goals, and they were big and marvelous. As you looked into the future you saw some wonderful things. A lot of hard work, but a beautiful outcome.

And then, for one reason or another, “life got in the way”.

Life can “get in the way” in all kinds of ways. A sickness. A business setback. Costs and expenses you hadn’t anticipated.

Even the perfectly normal and natural process of raising a family can put a brake on your dreams. With a family to support you might find your plans overly risky.

Has this happened to you? Do you remember some of those dreams? The things you were going to achieve?

I’m asking because we sometimes feel it is too late.

Once a dream has slipped through our fingers we often feel that the moment has passed.

With adulthood, children, aging parents and a host of other responsibilities and concerns, it’s all too easy to stick to the straight, narrow, dependable and reasonable road.

I get that. I understand those concerns. They are legitimate.

But here is something I have been feeling myself recently. I have been feeling the edges of those dreams coming back into view. I sense a flicker. A possibility.

My dreams today are not exactly as they were twenty or thirty years ago. I have changed, and so has the world.

But my dreams today are as big as the ones I once had. And when I look closely, they are not so very different. There are still some common goals and values woven in there.

Can I achieve them? Do I have time?

Well, if I consider the first 20 years of my life as being devoted to childhood and education…then right now, at the grand age of 51, I’m only about half way through my adult life.

Do I have time to set some new goals and pursue some big dreams?

You bet I do.

Find out how you can set goals effectively with my guide, Goal Setting Rituals…

Ditch goals and get the life you want

Each year millions of people fail to achieve their dreams. 97 per cent abandon their commitment towards self improvement within 30 days of their New Year’s resolutions and Harvard Business School say goals get in the way of success. All in all it leaves people discouraged, frustrated, unmotivated and feeling like failures.

Why do people continue to set themselves up for disappointment year after year? 

Because goal setting is hyped as the secret to success, yet international research indicates that accomplishment is rare, people seldom feel fulfilled or happier once they’ve achieved their goal and the process creates stress.

I believe goals definitely have their place; but on the whole, they’re not the best formula for success. Goals inhibit you by being too narrow, inflexible and taking the place of expanded thinking.

I have to say, I love validation, especially when it comes from Harvard Business School! A recent white paper supports my views as it states goal setting, “Can degrade employee performance, harm interpersonal relationships, corrode organizational culture, and motivate risky and unethical behaviors.  In many situations, the damaging effects of goal setting outweigh its benefits.”

I’m not surprised by the Harvard findings. I see very few people achieving their personal and business goals. They become discouraged; it erodes their confidence and affects their ability to persist.

So what am I suggesting to replace it? A ‘success without goal setting’ paradigm which overcomes the narrow focus of goals by opening the mind to an array of possibilities and successes. Here are four strategies I use with my clients that have made a positive difference and set them up for continued achievement.

Use your EPS not your GPS – A GPS, like goals, efficiently guides you from A to B, but you may be missing out on spectacular scenery and robbing yourself of excitement and adventure along the way. Alternatively, your EPS (emotional positioning system) offers a sense of direction and suggests you fearlessly follow your emotional guidance and explore the plethora of side streets and panorama.  Your EPS also has the added benefit of steering you towards discovering your life purpose. Don’t live a small life with goals, explore possibilities and live large.

Live for the moment not the morrow – Traditional goal setting focuses on present pain for future gain; “I’ll save money now so I can splurge on my holiday later” or “I’ll diet until Christmas so I can pig out at the parties”. In my new bestselling book Wake Up Live the Life You Love…Living in the Now, I highlight the importance of enjoying the present moment. You can even plan for the future in the present. Unhappiness occurs when you wish your life away by thinking, “I’ll be happy when…”  It’s also important to avoid getting stuck in the past by being overly nostalgic or having regrets.

Live by a ‘theme’ – The specifics in the often used SMART (specific, measurable, attainable, reasonable and time bound) goals can be limiting. Living by a life theme expands your focus to life’s possibilities and opens the mind to a range of opportunities and paths instead of a small, potentially limiting, niche. There’s greater potential in ‘spread my knowledge about quilt making’ (theme) as compared to ‘write a book about quilt making’ (goal). The former can include books, blogs, training, videos etc. and offers more opportunities to achieve.

Embrace the notion of ‘this or something better’ – Goals dictate an end result, the one you think is ‘best’. However, things don’t always go to plan when there’s something better around the corner. I remember desperately wanting a job and discovering I didn’t get it. A week later I got a better job at twice the pay! Failure is success in disguise.

So I encourage you to live courageously and achieve the life you want today.

If you want to discover more tips on Success without Goal Setting then listen to my recent interview on the Be, Do, Have approach by visiting – http://www.madisenharper.com/podcasts&videos.html#SuccessWithoutGoalSetting

Madisen Harper is an international author, inspirational speaker, life enrichment mentor and business consultant who believes life is meant to be fun and easy. Her latest bestselling book, Wake Up…Live the Life You Love – Living in the Now, was co-authored with success expert Brian Tracy, sales champion Tom Hopkins, Millionaire Mentor Gregory Scott Reid and The Secret’s business guru John Assaraf and spiritual leader Dr Michael Beckwith.  Mid-2010 sees the publication of 100% accountABLE™ a companion to her most successful keynote and workshop. Receive 100s of practical tips to create a more fulfilling  life by visiting http://www.MadisenHarper.com and subscribing to her FREE ‘Right Here, Right Now’ VIDEO newsletter.

For several years, I have chosen a theme word to keep me focused on what I am trying to achieve. For example, one year the word was “Product,” when I was focused on creating lots of new products. That single word keeps me on the right track, and working toward my goals.

Your theme should be one or two words that relate to your most important goals for the year. Examples of themes might be Organization, Focus, Influence, Visibility, Service, Revenue, Involvement, Delegate, etc. Here is how you can choose your theme and use it to help you achieve more in the new year.

First, look at your goals for the coming year. If you have not set your goals yet, do it. You can not reach goals that you have not even formed. Oh, and write them down. That is important. Print them out and keep the list somewhere where you see it often, such as your office wall.(If the list is not for public consumption, then put it in a desk drawer or print it on a card you keep in your wallet.)

What needs to change for you to be able to reach the goals you have set? Maybe you tend to start a lot of things and never finish them. “Focus” might be a good theme for you. Perhaps your issue is that you lose track of projects, miss deadlines or even forget to invoice clients. Then “Organization” could be the right theme. Do you spend too much time on things with no clear benefit to your business? Maybe your theme should be “Revenue.”

Keep your theme positive.“Stop Procrastinating” is negative. A better choice would be “Timely,” “Now” or “Do it Now.”

Choose only one theme. If you say that your theme for the year is “Focus, Involvement, Revenue and Organization,” well, you’ve blown the “Focus” thing right out of the gate. One theme.

The purpose of your theme is to keep you focused on the things you need to do to reach your goal. Print out graphics of your theme word and post them on your wall, your computer, your phone, wherever you will see them often. Make your theme word the background for your computer desktop.

As you make decisions during the year, remember your theme. For example, if you are offered a position on the board of your professional association, should you accept? The answer is more likely to be yes if your theme is “Involvement” or “Visibility” than if it is “Focus” or “Revenue.” Always ask yourself, “Would this choice be consistent with my theme and move me closer to my goals?” If so, go for it. If not, think long and hard before making that choice.

Although I tend to think in terms of a theme for a year, your theme does not have to be tied to the calendar. Your circumstances may change at any time, and your theme should change along with the needs of your business.

So what is your theme?

1. Decide what you want. If you don’t know what you want, you certainly can’t get it. That is only natural. So decide on what your dream is: a million dollars, health, travel, clothes, a happy marriage. Focus on your true dream. Many people say they want money, but their true dream is what they will be able to do with the money. Your dream may be to have wealth, or it may be to have the freedom to travel, or the ability to spend your time as you wish.

2. Put it on paper. You must see with your real eyes what your “mind’s eye” has visualized. In so doing, you impress upon your brain the dream you want–and this makes it come true faster. Write down your dream. Post it somewhere where you will see it every day. Some people go a step further and create a vision board.

3.Start at the beginning. Put the steps to reach your dreams into logical sequence, then go step by step. If your dream is worth having, it is worth working for. Don’t take shortcuts that may keep you from reaching your dream.

4. Put it in motion. A dream that lacks motion is never achieved, so get the dream moving. It begins to take form with motion. You may make mistakes–but you are moving forward as you do. Almost any action is better than no action.

5. Don’t settle for less. Once your plan is in motion, it only takes gentle taps to keep it moving forward. “Good enough” is not true success. Don’t lower your expectations or undersell your dream. Make it pay off in full–somehow it will.

6. Recognize its arrival. Once the dream is realized then relax and enjoy it to its fullest. There is a human tendency to always want more, no matter how much we have. Don’t curb ambition–but do curb greediness. Remember that what you have today may have been your dream only yesterday.

Copyright Cathy Stucker – Derivative work created based on a work in the public domain

Don’t overwhelm yourself. If your to-do list for today is: (1) Clean out the garage, (2) Write a book, (3) Bring peace to the Middle East…well, you may be setting yourself up to fail. Your daily list should only contain tasks you have a reasonable chance of completing that day.

You can still have a master list of all of those things you want or need to do, but your list for a single day should only include what you plan to do that day. Listing 127 tasks and completing six of them does not lead to a feeling of accomplishment. Especially if you added eight tasks to your list that day. However, planning to accomplish six things, and doing so, feels good. Be realistic about what you can do in one day.

Set aside some focused time. I will set a timer for 15 minutes, 45 minutes or some other amount of time, and work only on a specific task. No checking email, no “just one phone call,” no checking eBay or Twitter. Just work on the task. It’s amazing how much you can get done without distractions.

And one more thing: I set my daily goals the evening before. It makes it easier to dive right into the day, first thing in the morning.

So, get started on your daily goals and see what you accomplish.

• Lose 10 pounds.
• Earn $100,000 this year.
• Make 20 sales this month.

Those goals have to do with specific accomplishments, and they can be motivating. They can also be frustrating. When you lose just nine pounds or make 17 sales, you feel like a failure.

On the other hand, learning goals are about taking the steps that will get us to our other goals.

For example, instead of (or in addition to) the performance goal of losing 10 pounds, there could be a learning goal of discovering a fun way to exercise or learning to cook healthful meals.

I heard a presentation the other night by Keith Ferrazzi, who was talking about the concepts presented in his new book, Who’s Got Your Back: The Breakthrough Program to Build Deep, Trusting Relationships That Create Success–and Won’t Let You Fail. The book is about building a few lifeline relationships in our lives, with peers who will support us, encourage us, be honest with us and ultimately not let us fail. That includes setting the goals by which you will define success. Your lifeline friends can help you identify those goals, keep you on track and hold you accountable.

One part of Keith’s talk that resonated strongly with me was the talk about learning goals vs performance goals. In the book, he says:

Certain goals, known as “performance goals,” imply a finite result, like a pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. But to me, far more important is developing a process and a road map that help you achieve [the goal] in a given time. In other words, you should be thinking about the rainbow, not just the pot of gold.

That is a wonderful image. How often do we get caught up in the quest for the pot of gold (sometimes almost literally) and forget about the rainbow? Performance goals are fine. They give us a target to aim at and it is satisfying to reach them. But learning goals help us the acquire the skills and knowledge we need to move toward those performance goals.

So the next time you are setting a goal, don’t just look at where you want to end up. Think about the path that will take you there, and beyond.